One of my favorite initial questions to ask a learning group after we have been apart for a few weeks is, “What is something that you are really proud of yourself about since we last met?”
This question does several things:
- Gets everyone thinking about the learning from past sessions.
- Allows for each person to truly think about their own progress.
- Jump starts the discussion.
- Reconnects the participants as they share and listen to each other.
- Sets the groundwork for the next learnings.
In a recent session, one answer surprised and pleased all of us in the room. It made everyone just as proud of the participant who said it as he was proud of himself.
The answer was, “I am proud that I was brave enough to admit to my leader that I did not want to be in a leadership role anymore.”
Surprise. Silence for a few seconds.
Everyone knew that this person had stepped down yet had remained within the department. The company had named a new leader in his place. The surprise, I think, was that he allowed himself to be vulnerable enough to admit to the rest of us that he had tried the leadership gig and had decided he preferred to be a strong worker rather than a leader.
Do I think he has the capability to be a leader? Yes. Is it just not the right time for him? Maybe. Will he change his mind and try it again at some point in his career? I hope so. Will he be a leader by being a strong co-worker? Yes.
Sometimes (most times), knowing what you don’t like or can’t commit to is just as important as knowing what you do like, enjoy, want to keep doing. Figuring it out is valuable and is something of which to be proud.
Marlene Sprouse
